


Soft and Only You, Lost and Lonely You

by agirlnamedtruth



Category: Hex (TV)
Genre: Aftercare, Alternate Universe - Canon, Cunnilingus, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Face-Sitting, Knifeplay, Leather Kink, Light Bondage, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Sex Toys, Sexual Fantasy, Sharing Clothes, Spanking, Strap-Ons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-20
Updated: 2014-08-20
Packaged: 2018-02-13 20:03:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2163405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agirlnamedtruth/pseuds/agirlnamedtruth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing about always having to be powerful and in control is that you begin to yearn not to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Soft and Only You, Lost and Lonely You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [weekendgothgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/weekendgothgirl/gifts).



> Written for [BDSM Fandom](http://bdsm-fandom.livejournal.com/154149.html)'s Summer Sizzler. Title from [Just Like Heaven](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3nPiBai66M) by The Cure. AU where Ella doesn't end up with Leon.

Ella opened her door before closing her eyes and opening them again. She could not believe what she was seeing.

"Is that my coat?" Ella asked even though she clearly recognised it.

"Yeah, I had to-" Thelma started but Ella wasn't listening.

"And my corset?!"

"Yeah, it was a nightmare getting into it!" Thelma complained, yanking it up.

"Then you shouldn't have gotten into it!" Ella complained back. She tried to ignore the way Thelma's breasts, larger than her own, were practically spilling out over the top of the corset. "You can't just steal other people's clothes!"

Thelma rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her waist, pulled in by the corset's strings. "I can't exactly go on a shopping spree at TopGhost, can I?"

"What was wrong with what you were wearing?" Ella asked, pushing through the door and closing it behind her should anybody hear her arguing with thin air about its choice in wardrobe.

"I spilled Dr Pepper down my top and this was all I could find. It's not my fault you only own corsets and knee high boots, what are you anyway, a dominatrix on the side?"

"No, I just... You could have asked and I would have got you something," Ella said, taking deep breaths.

"You would have preferred I just waited for you with my tits out?"

"Yes!" Ella snapped before realising what she'd said. "I mean no. I mean, oh God, you are the most pain in the arse a dead girl has ever been, I swear."

"Don't be like that," Thelma said with a pout, reaching out to take Ella's hands. "I'll make it up to you, cross my heart."

Ella looked away. It wasn't that she wanted to fight with Thelma, it was just seeing her dressed like that - like her - was doing completely inappropriate things to her and she'd always made it clear that Thelma's flirting and charm wouldn't work on her. And she'd promised herself she wouldn't get involved with a human. Not even a dead one.

"Just take them off, will you?" Ella said reluctantly, looking for Thelma's discarded clothes. When she turned back around, Thelma had stripped off her jeans and was fiddling with the first hook on the corset.

"Oh my God, stop!" Ella said, throwing her hands in the air. "I meant for you to wait until I left the room. Jesus."

Standing there in just a pair of purple knickers, her black leather greatcoat covering the back of her legs, Thelma looked more like a dominatrix than she ever had. All she needed was a whip and she’d be perfect. Oh, God. Ella ran a hand over her eyes. She could feel sweat beading on her brow and the room was starting to spin under her feet.

"Are you alright?" Thelma asked, laying her hands on Ella's arms again.

"Yes, I'm fine just-" Ella took a deep breath and pulled herself together. "I just wasn't prepared to see you like that."

"Like what?" Thelma asked, frowning and pulling up the sides of the corset again.

"It doesn't matter," Ella said, focusing on Thelma's face and not her tits. "Look, I'll go and get you something more... comfortable, ok?"

Thelma shrugged and Ella retreated out the door before she could say anything else.

-x-

Ella walked around for three quarters of an hour in the cold winter air before she got a grip on herself. There were just some things she couldn't tell anybody, not even other witches. Over the years there had been so many rituals, so many exchanges of power, some things - completely innocent things - took on a whole new meaning in her eyes. Ropes didn't trap her, chains weren't cold, shackles were not heavy. Stinging pain wasn't mutually exclusive to burning pleasure. Being told what to do could make the fiercest creatures calm. The thunder clap and lightening strike of a hand hitting flesh wasn't a fight but a kiss. And holding still showed the greatest of control.

Ella sighed. Her clothes weren't a fashion statement. Her leather was a message. It was tight and impenetrable. It was dark and hard, unforgiving, made by her own hands from a beast she'd butchered herself. The purple wasn't just a splash of colour. It was regal, it was royal, it was her staking her place in the food chain, right at the top. So when she'd seen Thelma challenge that, she'd been torn. Part of her wanted to throw her down, fight her or fuck her. Knock her back where she belonged, in sheer lace and frills. But another part of her longed once again to kneel. To be silenced. To be dominated. Being top dog, the only one left fighting, was exhausting sometimes. But she could never admit that out loud. While she longed to submit, to give up that burden for a while, she couldn't bear for Thelma to think she was weak. Or that she couldn’t do what needed to be done when the time called for it.

She rifled through the laundry, stealing clothes she hoped would fit Thelma. She'd been gone over an hour now so she couldn't return empty handed and she wanted to look like she’d put at least some thought into what she’d chosen. A white flag of sorts

When she returned, with a white denim skirt and a yellow top with a cartoon cat on it, the best she could find, all tucked under her arm, she mentally catalogued all her excuses. As she stepped into her room, she realised they weren't even needed. Thelma had gone.

-x-

Later, when the stars had risen and the world seemed set back on its axis again, Ella was still awake. She was sure she was safe now, free to examine her little itches and niggles about Thelma. Besides, she couldn't sleep anyway; she was wound too tight to.

She slipped her hands under the covers, one toying with the hem of her black silk camisole while the other hesitated at the waistband of her black lace French knickers, not sure if she dared push forward in either direction. Even though Thelma was long gone, taking her favourite outfit with her, Ella couldn't shake the girl from her mind. She tried telling herself it wasn't about anybody else, just her and her completely private, completely secret kinks, as she pushed up her camisole.

Her fingers splayed over her stomach, nails digging in and her fingertips pinching the skin. Even the smallest lick of pain made her shiver and she pulled the cover tighter, rolling onto her side and reaching up to cup her breast. She tweaked her nipple, pressing her other hand between her thighs. Grinding down into the side of her hand, she pinched her nipple harder, twisting it between her fingers.

She turned onto her front, pressing her fingers against her clit through the lace of her underwear. She could feel how wet she was already through the thin material. Unbidden, pictures of Thelma in her corset came to mind. She raised her hips, rutting against her fingers.

 _Look at her_ , Ella thought to herself, _wearing your clothes, in your room, she could take everything from you, leave you naked and begging and you'd still want to give her more_. Ella pulled the gusset of her knickers aside, shoving a finger inside herself. _Now look at you_ , she continued, _fucking yourself late at night in the dark, too scared to actually get what you want_.

Ella bit back a moan. Just because it was night, it didn't mean she couldn't be overheard. She pulled her hand away from her breast and switched it with the hand pressed against her cunt, pushing herself up on her elbow. She brought her hand up to her mouth to muffle any sound she might make. Pushing two fingers into her cunt now, she brought the other one into her mouth, tasting herself, wishing it was Thelma but that was impossible, for many reasons.

"Fuck," she swore, biting down on her finger as she rocked her hips, her cheek pushed into the pillow. She could feel herself hovering on that elusive edge but she couldn't quite get there. "Fuck, fuck , fuck."

 _Maybe because you don't have my permission to come_ , Thelma's voice whispered in her head as she furiously rolled her hips, fingers sliding in and out, thumb haphazardly rubbing at her clit.

"Oh God," Ella moaned, her blasphemies turning into strangled cries until she couldn't hold it in any longer and she had to push her whole face into the pillow, screaming Thelma's name into her pillowcase as she came, pleasure shaking through her like the earth below was cracking open.

When she surfaced again, she was red faced and out of breath, her mind finally as exhausted as her body.

-x-

The black fog of dreamless sleep rolled back slightly and Ella was aware of rolling onto her back. However, when she opened her eyes, she wasn't sure if she was awake or dreaming. Thelma was propped up on her elbow on the empty side of the bed.

"What are you doing now?" Ella asked just in case she was actually conscious.

"Me? Absolutely nothing. You on the other hand, you're creating this whole entire dream to suit your likes; I'm just here for the ride." Thelma raised her eyebrow suggestively.

"Yes but am I _dreaming_ dreaming or are you putting this all in my head?" Ella asked, pulling the covers up around her chin.

"Do you think if I was, I'd still be wearing this contraption?" Thelma asked, pulling the covers off them both dramatically, revealing Thelma's ghostly skin coated in her leather coat and corset, which had found a leather mini-skirt to match it.

"I don't know, you seemed awfully quick to get into it," Ella pointed out with a huff.

"Yeah, well, I didn't know how much it would mean to you," Thelma said, dragging her index finger over Ella's collarbone. "But I do now."

"I don't know what you mean," Ella lied.

"Please," Thelma said with a snort. "This is all in your mind, you can't hide from it."

"Thelma, stop messing about," Ella protested wearily.

"This is your dream, sweatheart, if you don't want to have it, wake up," Thelma suggested but when nothing happened, she grinned. "See? You've been thinking about this all day, haven't you?"

Ella nodded before she realised she was doing it.

"I thought so," Thelma mused, still absently running her finger over Ella's chest, teasing the curve of her breast. "Now why don't you tell me _exactly_ what you want me to do?"

Biting her lip, Ella put her hand on Thelma's corset - or her corset, really. Her fingers toyed with the leather the same way Thelma was playing with her silk pyjama top. She shouldn't tell her, not when there was even the slightest risk that this wasn't all the fevered projections of her imagination but she couldn't stop the words from tumbling out. "I want you to dominate me, completely."

Thelma blinked but she smoothed it over with a wide smile and an attractive blush. "Well, aren't you a kinky little thing.”

"If you're not going to take it seriously..." Ella started, her tone a warning.

"Of course I am!" Thelma promised. "That just wasn't what I was expecting."

“What were you expecting?” Ella asked, leaning back into the pillow and relaxing, the weight finally lifted by admitting it out loud, even if it wasn’t real.

“I don’t know, you seem to like all these knives of yours,” Thelma said, glancing at them.

“They aren’t toys,” Ella chided, even though the thought did make her heart rate pick up. Keeping one eye on her, Thelma reached down to the floor and picked one up. “No! Not that one, that’s dipped in the blood of a _valravn_.”

Thelma dropped it back on the floor, scrunching up her nose. “Why would you leave something like that lying around your room?”

“You don’t want to know,” Ella said quickly before nodding to a harmless and relatively blunt dagger that was balanced on a pile of clothes.

“That one, eh?” Thelma said, disgust twisting into a smile as she jumped up to retrieve it. On her way back she collected a scarf that she was sure would come in handy.

When she climbed back on the bed, she took the scenic route, straddling Ella’s knees and working her way up her body on her hands and knees.

“Thelma...” Ella started, a note of reluctance still in her voice. Not about Thelma, or even about sex, but about giving up control.

“Shhh, now, you’ve already told me what you want,” Thelma whispered. “Let me give it to you.”

“ _Salvus_ ,” Ella said suddenly, nodding at the same time.

“Bless you,” Thelma said, brow creasing in confusion.

“That’s my safe word, _salvus_ ,” Ella explained. “If we’re doing this then I need to know I can trust myself into your hands and that I can trust _myself_.”

“Hold on, I’m going to need to write that down,” Thelma said, grabbing a pen and scrawling the word on the back of her hand. “ _Salvus_ , got it.”

Ella breathed in deeply, shaking with the effort to stay calm. “We’re really going to do this?”

“Please, I’ve been thinking about this for months,” Thelma admitted, leaning down and hovering just above her lips. “It’s a good thing you caught me trying on your clothes when you did because had you walked in a few moments later, I would have been in a _very_ compromising position, I’ll have you know.”

Ella breathed out again, her breath as ragged as her patience was getting. She longed for Thelma to close the gap between them, to pin her down to the bed, to bind her hands with the scarf but it wouldn’t work at all if she _told_ her to do it.

Thelma grinned, watching the rise and fall of Ella’s chest. She didn’t need to be a genius to read the signs, Thelma felt like she’d spent half her life – and her death – sexually frustrated. She raised the dagger to her own thumb, checking it was safe to play with. Thankfully it was one of the few that escaped Ella’s meticulous sharpening.

She turned it on Ella, pressing it just above her heaving chest. “Raise your arms.”

Ella nodded eagerly, her red hair falling away from her face as she stretched up, raising her hands above her head. 

“Would you like me to tell you what I’m going to do with you?” Thelma asked, cleverly checking her plan through with Ella before she executed it. Ella nodded again. “You’re my prisoner, little witch, and I’m going to tie you up and have my wicked way with you. You’ll fuck me, with your fingers and your pretty little mouth when I command it and if it isn’t good enough...”

Thelma found Ella’s thigh with the palm of her hand and slapped it. “You’ll get spanked, like a naughty little girl. Do you understand?”

Ella moaned, pushing her hips up, grinding into Thelma’s arse. “Yes, Thelma.”

“Excuse me? I’m not your little Casper friend now, I’m your Mistress and I expect you to show me that respect,” Thelma said, reaching back and slapping her other thigh.

“Yes, Mistress!” Ella corrected herself hurriedly. 

“Better,” Thelma said soothingly. “And if you’re very good, I’ll show you the present I brought with me tonight. How about that?”

“Yes, Mistress,” Ella said, mind turning over what Thelma would see as a treat. “I’ll be very good. I promise.”

“You better be,” Thelma said, dragging the dagger up over her chest and stopping just above her collar bone. “My little witch.”

Ella panted, her breath escaping her too fast for her to control. She could feel her cunt tingling, starting to ache where she longed to touch herself, where she longed to be touched.

“Please, Mistress, let me fuck you. Let me show you how good I am,” Ella pleaded.

“Not yet,” Thelma said, laying the dagger aside and picking up the scarf again. “First let’s take those hands away. I don’t want you feeling any pleasure that doesn’t come from me.”

“Yes, Mistress,” Ella said, stretching up further as Ella tied her hands together with one end of the scarf. She fastened the other end to the headboard and pulled it a little to make sure it wasn’t too tight. 

“There, that’s better. When I want your hands, you’ll know about it,” Thelma told her.

Ella licked her lips, knowing if she didn’t want her fingers then she’d want her mouth. She longed to taste her, to bury her face in her cunt and forget about the threat of the world ending and how she was the one who had to stop it.

Thelma climbed up further, hiking her skirt up and kneeling to her full height, appreciating the sight below her. Ella’s hair was darker in her shadow and there was a hungry look in her eyes. Thelma couldn’t decide if she wouldn’t want to meet her in a dark alley or if she really, really would. It was almost criminal to cover the lower half of her face with her thighs but the glint in Ella’s eyes was more than enough to make it worth it.

She took Ella’s red hair between her fingers and pulled her head up to meet her cunt. “Eat me, little witch,” she commanded, sending shivers through herself as well as Ella.

Ella nodded, her nose brushing against Thelma’s clit as she did. She raised her head, the tip of her tongue sliding across Thelma’s lips, opening her up, slipping between them. She teased her clit, grazing with her teeth before soothing it with a kiss of her lips. She wished she had her hands free, to hold Thelma’s hips and push her down onto her face but she made do with arching up instead, her tongue curling to lick all the way from her entrance to her clit again.

“Fuck, yes, Ella!” Thelma shouted, pushing down onto Ella’s face.

Breathing heavily through her nose, Ella took the opportunity to lean back again, putting all her effort into licking Thelma’s cunt, tongue dipping in and out with the tiniest movements of her head. Thelma’s hand tightened in her hair, pulling it again but Ella liked the pain, it anchored her, focused her. She closed in on Thelma’s clit one last time, latching onto it, alternately sucking and flicking her tongue over it until Thelma was practically screaming the place down. She held onto the head board with her other hand as she came, thighs shaking and her voice hoarse.

When she shuffled backwards, she tapped her hand gently against Ella’s cheek. “Good girl.”

“Thank you, Mistress,” Ella said, warmth flooding over her like she’d just come as well, even though she hadn’t been touched.

“You’re good at improvisation, aren’t you?” Thelma asked conversationally, resting her head against Ella’s chest for a moment. “If you were a prisoner with your hands tied, you’d find ways to get around that?”

“I guess?” Ella said with a shrug.

“Good,” Thelma replied, reaching up to untie the scarf from the bed but keeping her hands tied. “I want you to fuck yourself with your fingers for me.”

Ella bit her lip, processing the request. She’d be more than glad to put on a show for Thelma but the bondage made it a little tricky. 

Thelma climbed off her, pulling off her French knickers and letting them fall to the floor before she settled in Ella’s chair. “Go on then.”

Ella brought her fettered hands down and tried to reach her cunt without much success. She could just about brush her clit with the tips of her fingers but actually fucking herself with them was impossible lying down with her hands bound.

Directing all her strength to her feet, she pushed herself into a sitting position against the headboard and by bringing her knees up and spreading them as wide as they could go, she finally managed to work two fingers inside herself. She was wet enough from waiting and the little burn of pain only made her want to push herself harder, go faster.

Thelma watched as she opened herself up, trying to appear indifferent but Ella could see the effect she was having on her. Dilated pupils, swallowing, that one hitched breath; Ella had been around long enough to know desire when she saw it. Thelma stood suddenly and Ella froze, the moment of calm shattering.

“Well, keep going,” Thelma said with a wave of her hands before adding slightly more authoritatively. “I didn’t tell you to stop, did I?”

“No, Mistress,” Ella admitted, redoubling her efforts, one hand twisting to hold her thigh while she tried pushing three fingers inside.

She watched as Thelma bent down, digging in a bag and Thelma glanced up, catching her. “Close your eyes. It’s supposed to be a surprise.”

“Yes, Mistress,” Ella said, complying. With her eyes closed she could hear the rustle of a plastic bag and then after a few bumps and a curse from Thelma’s lips, she heard buckles fastening.

“Alright, you can open your eyes now,” Thelma told her and she opened one eye first, then both at the same time to make sure she wasn’t seeing things.

“You’ve got a dick?” Ella asked, taking in the shiny black toy that Thelma was wearing, the black leather straps cutting into the flesh of her arse, keeping the pretend cock in place. She still had the corset on but her coat had been unceremoniously thrown over the chair along with the skirt.

“Ella!” Thelma complained, breaking character for a second. “Can you not sound so scandalised please, it’s just a strap-on.”

“It’s a strap on cock?” Ella repeated. “I thought lesbians weren’t into dicks?”

“Please, we’re not into men with dicks. These babies however...” Thelma ran her hand over the dildo, stroking it. “I am very into.”

Ella stared at it for a second, ordering her thoughts and working out just what Thelma was thinking. “You’re going to fuck me with it?”

Thelma nodded eagerly. “I said I would if you were a good girl, didn’t I? Unless you don’t want-”

“No, I want!” Ella decided, scrabbling up onto her knees to beg. “Please, Mistress, I’ve been good. I fucked myself for you, opened myself up for your cock. Please fuck me with it.”

“Well,” Thelma said slowly and teasingly, taking the loose end of the scarf and leading Ella off the bed. “Why don’t you show me how much you want it first?”

Ella knelt without hesitation, ready to beg again but Thelma rubbed the toy against her lips before she could speak. “Suck it.”

Ella brought her bound hands up, cupping the dildo between them and lowering her mouth onto it, licking and sucking as though it was really a part of Thelma that she was worshipping. Her knees started to ache on the hard floor but she just pushed harder down on them, sharpening the pain into pleasure. She swallowed the dildo down, breathing heavily through her nose again until she had to pull away and drink in air.

“That’s enough,” Thelma commanded, pulling her up by her restraints again. 

Ella stumbled along behind Thelma, her knees still protesting and her cunt still desperate for some attention, her whole world narrowed down to Thelma’s next command. “Bend over, hands on the bed.”

Ella planted her feet shoulders width apart and laid her tied hands on the sheets, sticking her arse in the air for Thelma. She cried out when an unexpected slap landed across her arse, the heat of it going straight to her cunt.

“No, _yes, Mistress_? Do you not want to get fucked?” Thelma asked, bringing her other hand down on Ella’s other cheek, eliciting another squeak of pain.

“Yes, Mistress, please!” Ella begged, her voice and body shaking.

“That’s better,” Thelma muttered and ran her fingers over Ella’s lips, pushing two fingers inside make sure she was ready.

Without further warning, she lined up the head of the dildo and slid it in. It was seven inches of black rubber, firm but not unbearably hard, with ridges that hadn’t made much of a difference when she was sucking it but sent pulses running through her as Thelma pulled back and slammed it back in.

Ella clung onto the sheets, nearly in tears, not from pain or humiliation in being taken in such a way but out of need. She’d spent so long clinging to the edge with barely a touch that now she was getting what she wanted, it was almost too much. Ever thrust of Thelma’s hips threatened to send her over that edge but she held herself back, her legs trembling and her bottom lip red and swollen where she’d bitten it so hard.

“Mistress, please may I come?” she begged, finally, unable to hold out any longer.

“Yes, Ella, good little girl, come for me, come for your Mistress,” Thelma whispered, pulling Ella’s sweat damp hair away from her face so she could kiss her cheek as Ella feel apart underneath her, her knees buckling and the dildo slipping out of her cunt as she fell to her knees beside the bed, spent.

“Good girl,” Thelma said again, stroking her face and kissing her lips as she untied the scarf. 

Ella smiled up at her, basking in the afterglow. “Thank you, Mistress.”

Thelma slipped the strap on off, setting it on the chair with her clothes. She quickly unhooked the corset as well, each clasp popping free until she could pull it off her, admiring the pressure lines it had left on her skin.

Naked, she turned her attention back to Ella, offering her a hand up from the floor. “Come on, little love, back to bed with you.”

“Yes, Mistress,” Ella said, her voice sounding far away.

“Thelma, sweetheart. Just Thelma now.” She led her over to the bed, pulled her silk camisole over her head and laid her naked beneath her sheets.

Getting in bedside her, Thelma spooned her from behind, stroking her skin and singing to her, slowing down the beat of _Just Like Heaven_ because she didn’t know any lullabies that would soothe a witch that was centuries older than The Cure.

When she was sure Ella was asleep, she closed her own eyes and opened them again, finding herself perched on Ella’s chair still, fully dressed in Ella’s borrowed clothes while Ella herself slept on, under untouched sheets with her silk pyjamas sill in place.

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” Thelma said, smiling at her friend, sleeping soundly at last.

**Author's Note:**

> As of 01/01/18, I'm opting to disable comments. [More information here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13077201).


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